Friday, September 18, 2009

post-exam syndrome

hi world!
first and foremost...
im going to give you guys a big BIG =D
'cz im now sitting in front of the plasma tv set in my house...
feeling peacefully blissfully and free-of-worries!!

well...
as i've promised im going to update a more proper post this time...

***

i remember once my uncle told me
"medical students must have buttock power..."
"why?"i asked...
"because being a medical student, you gotta accept the fact that you gotta stick to your chair all the time to studystudystudy and memorisememorisememorise..."

i doubted it as first...
i thought i will never be that kinda person who will just sit there and study the whole day long...
because im kinda playful and easily bored and end up "fishing" whenever i study for a long period of time...
but after preparing and sitting for my first term exam...
*clearing my throat
-the fact is just too hard to be denied-

i don't intend to make any fussings here, merely think that it's an experience worth sharing...
XP

***

i'd like to share a quick glance of my life a few days right before my first term medical examination in USM...during that few days, our lectures on the last topic, MUSCULOSKELETON have completed so basically we don't need to attend classes anymore except for English and Japanese classes(pity me gotta attend both of them.TT)apart from that, most of the time we'll be staying in our tiny cramped congested oxygen-lacking room to...S.T.U.D.Y

my schedule was roughly illustrated as below:
0800-first alarm clock rings
0815-second alarm clock rings+wake up+quick bath+dashing breakfast
0845-my study marathon starts
1100-quick lunch break
1130-study
1800-dinner break
1830-study
0300-collapse

so what do you think?...well, i think i might've turned crazy...HAHA!!and i usually have biscuits for my breakfast, more biscuits for my lunch and rice for my dinner with moremoremore biscuits during the midnight...im not ashamed to tell you that i did experience some emotional breakdown at the beginning of the study week, but im lucky enough to have my family's full support and love which managed to pull me up from drowning...im feeling utmost thankful and grateful for that!=)

what my uncle told  me was definitely true indeed! medical students do need to possess a special ability, named THE ENOURMOUS GLUTEAL MAXIMUS a.k.a BUTTOCK POWER...wakaka!!we got a whole mountain-high stack of lecture notes to be read and almost every pages contain important facts that need to be memorised! it seems that everything that is mentioned in the lecture notes are important and that even every diagrams, pictures and microscopic slides need to be recognised and must be stuck in your brain as they will definitely be coming out for the Data Interpretation paper. as for me, the muscles part is still the most challenging one as i was really facing serious problem in memorising them. yup!i can remember them firmly right after i memorised, but if you are asking me the next day, i'll either be spending long time to recall or been unable to recall AT ALL! at some point i was really frustrated and disappointed at myself as i can see people having good brains wasting no effort at all to memorise all the muscle names, attachments and innervation and that they will never forget what they've memorised,unlike me...and this was the reason of the emoitonal breakdown i mentioned...as what my father told me...my soft spot is always losing myself to myself...since i was a toddler...i used to compare, even i said i don't want to.i used to be frustrated,angry of myself and sad after i lose to someone, even i said i didn't...i know it takes time to change this behaviour of mine, and i hope im working it out towards correction.wish me luck!^^

LUCKILY!!!
after talking to my parents i felt kinda woken up...studies and memorisations have become much more easy and efficient...but yet the process was still suffering. imagine your life only consists of eat,sleep and study...that's my life during that few days. it's not that im lazy to go out to excercise but i really don't have time for that.i slept for only max 5 hrs everyday,despite my usual >7hrs...and i didn't take any naps, if i did, i will only rest my head on my arms for the most 15 minutes...my pimples grow "wildly" on my forehead!!mainly due to sleep-lacking and stress i think...andandand...luckily i have a nice roommate,geok xin whom i can talk to whenever i feel too tired to study, we shared some laughters and fun though...simply talking nonsense and gossiping others...XP...

at the end of the story, all my efforts ended on the 3 hrs exam...an hour for every paper each day...if im asked to rate my performance during the exam, i will only give myself 50%...i did many stupid careless mistakes even the papers are actually considered easy...but i will never regret though for i knew that i've tried my best to memorise everything, i covered all the lecture notes, i felt well-prepared before entering the exam hall...i'll give myself 99% for my preparation, and if i didn't compare myself to the others,if i can concentrate more during the beginning and didn't experience any emotional stress, i'll give myself 100%...anyway...i'll see that as an important element of my life, i learnt something from that, and THIS, i believe, is the most important thing of all...though passing the exam is not everything, i do hope i can pass, really...some people may think that: who are you now?where have all your spirits gone?...for they know me, they know my quest for perfection...and i just wanna tell you guys that: my spirit is always there, and im not going to lose it easily...and i'll never ever give up, no matter how stupid am i compared to others, i will never lose my spirit.it's not that i've losen my grip towards my quest, it's just that i don't wanna be too possessed by them, it's simply too tiring...and after i thought for quite a long time, i choose to believe what most people been telling me, that is what makes a good doctor is not how he or she did well during their MD exams, it's their skills that matters, their hearts towards sick people, their empathy and enthusiasim in this profession to serve human beings...

*jiayoujiayou!!
:)

3 comments:

  1. to my dear buddy,ur post is very meaningful and touching...
    yeah.no matter wad,we shud not give up.. =)
    let's ganbatteh ba and become a gud doctor in the future 2gether! =)

    ReplyDelete
  2. anyway,at the moment now,take some fresh air and relax for a while ya...
    Happy holidays ya! ^^

    ReplyDelete
  3. thnx jack!
    yeaaaa~mz mz mz enjoy our precious hols!!!
    XP

    ReplyDelete