losing myself to nervousness

GOSH
no matter how well-prepared was i...
im still losing myself to nervousness=.=


i slept at 9.30pm last night
and i woke up at 3am this morning
i just felt so fresh and awake and couldn't sleep anymore
crazy???
i thought so too...
haha


let's back to the topic...
my OSCE CLINICAL paper just now was...
i kinda made a mess out of it...


firstly,i was sooo nervous prior entering the examination ward...The first station i faced: surprisingly,there isn't any doctor in that station. Only i realised that there are questions and an ECG strip on the table!!!GREAT,i was asked to interpret the ECG,state the abnormalities and give provisional diagnosis.With my palpitating heart,racing mind and blank brain,to make it worse,with my other group members taking history and performing PE and were presenting to doctors with volume and frequency that could reached into my ears,it was sooo hard for me to focus on the ECG strip!!!i knew,i was so confident and was pretty sure that i have all the knowledges in my brain,but,i was so,damned panic!the most obvious sign were ST elevation in inferior leads,with pathological Q wave,prolonged PR intervals,but i just couldn't identify the T wave inversion,and the worst of all...i forgot to check whether there's any left ventricular hypertrophy!!!


sorry for using all the medical jargons...
please bear with me,only for this post kay=)


my second station was history taking...my patient was a 16 years old male with 1 year history of smoking,3 days history of coughing out blood,and 2 days history of low grade fever and chest pain that is aggravated by cough,with no history of TB contact and family history of cancer...everything was running smoothly,till...when i was asked to give a provisional diagnosis,there are 2 major possibilities in my mind:pulmonary tuberculosis or bronchogenic carcinoma???then only i realised my biggest mistake:i forgot to ask for night sweat!!!luckily my doctor was so kind and he allowed me to ask one last question...alas,i made a correct diagnosis and was able to answer questions thrown by the doctors...


my third station was physical examination with a sarcastic-looking doctor. i think i did everything smoothly,till when the last bell rung and the exam was finish,only did i realised that there are few signs that i've missed to check!!!trust me,no matter how many times you have been practising,you'll still be forgetting something...


and it was over,finally...
conclusion:nervousness can ruin everything


one last paper for tomorrow:
Multiple Choice Questions
well,not so multiple though,you can choose between true,false or just leave it blank
i HATE making choices...

the disastrous week will be over real soon!!!
yesterday my mum called and asked:
we cook tangyuan when you come back kay?
so warm♥
hehe


ooyea...
i came across a doctor's blog today from india
and it worth a read=)
http://indianmedic.blogspot.com/